We know that an unintended pregnancy can be shocking and overwhelming.
We welcome you to take advantage of our pregnancy options counseling services free of charge and free of judgment or pressure.
We have created this webpage to help you begin sorting out your feelings about your pregnancy. In addition to the information here, you may find the Pregnancy Options Workbooks at the bottom of this page helpful.
No matter what you choose, rest assured that our specialized staff is equipped to provide you with honest information and guidance about whatever options you’re considering and we’re only a phone call away. Our goal is to help you make the best choice for you, whether you choose to continue your pregnancy, opt for abortion, or are seeking adoption alternatives.
Our counselors receive additional specialized training at Summit in the field of abortion and pregnancy options counseling. Our counselors are carefully chosen for their skill, experience, compassion and commitment to providing patients with honest, safe, and confidential help. Whether you’re seeking support for your first gynecological exam, help about a positive STD result, an unintended pregnancy, or considerations about birth control, we are here to help.
If you’ve just found out that you’re pregnant, you may be happy, shocked, or angry the list goes on and on. It’s important to know that you have choices regarding your pregnancy, and that your decision must be yours. Only you can make the best decision for yourself, but you must make a decision. The sooner you decide, the sooner you can responsibly move forward.
If you opt for abortion, doing so earlier rather than later is safer and less expensive, and more preferable for your physical and emotional health. If you opt to continue the pregnancy, you’ll want to seek out prenatal services as soon as possible.
Take some uninterrupted space and time to think (no TV, no kids, no cell phones, etc). Even if you’re overworked and busy, you owe it to yourself to think through this decision thoroughly.
Work your way towards answering these two questions:
- Is this an ideal time to bring a child into the world through my body?
- Am I genuinely prepared to raise a child in a responsible, nurturing and loving way?
The answers may not be as simple as “yes” or “no”, so don’t expect them to come that easily. Take your time. Without imposing notions of “right” and “wrong”, just be honest with yourself.
- What is best for you right now?
- What are you prepared to handle today?
Sit with the answers before moving on to the next set of considerations.
Of course you want to reach a “rational” conclusion, but don’t undermine your intuition. Take the opportunity to dig beneath the surface. What does your gut tell you? Are you are overwhelmed by the thoughts of balancing a child with work, school, and finances yet deep down, you don’t feel that abortion or adoption are good choices for you? Or perhaps, though you may have family, partner, or financial support, something inside questions your ability to nurture or successfully raise a child right now? If so, you may find it helpful to consider abortion or adoption alternatives.
Write it or say it. If you been feeling “shocked” since the news of your pregnancy, start by writing or saying your story out loud, alone or with someone you trust. This will help ground you and provide a foundation upon which to explore your options.
Learning from the past. Review your emotional history from the last 3-5 years. List the times you were extremely happy and optimistic, as well as times you were sad, lonely or depressed. What prompted longer bouts of happiness, joy, heartache, or depression? How have you dealt with losing a job or loved ones? Breakups or illness? What lessons of strength or patience can you draw on to help you now? What might your past suggest about your ability to emotionally handle parenting, or abortion or adoption alternatives?
Having a child is a lifetime commitment. Whether you are considering being a single parent or parenting with a partner, having a child is an infant, toddler, adolescent or teenager, parenting is a 24-hour/day job. Will you be willing to sacrifice your free time, needs, wants and privacy for your child, and can you do this without resentment and anger? Are you patient? Do you enjoy children? How do you deal with anger and frustration? If you’ve been lonely at all during the last several months/years, be sure you’re not considering a baby to help you feel needed, or as a cure to loneliness or sadness.
Talking with a partner. Whether you’re in a committed relationship or not, there are two people involved in this pregnancy. You’ll need to speak to one another without glossing over the uncomfortable stuff: discuss your financial and emotional expectations of one another. List some positive and negative aspects of your relationship, and talk openly about each item you’ve noted. Why are you together (or not)? Where do you see yourselves in a year or two with or without a child? If you’re in a committed relationship, ask each other the question, if we broke up, would we be willing respect one another and act civilly to one another for the sake of our child. It may not be the most romantic conversation you’ll ever have, but if you’re unwilling to be honest now, consider what that implies about your ability to be honest and direct one another in the future.
Beliefs, values, and unconditional love. What type belief system or values do you have? Are you prepared to support and love your children no matter who they become, even if their beliefs, religion or politics differ from yours? If you have hopes about a child’s sex/gender, how will you feel if it comes out differently? Can you offer unconditional love and acceptance to your child if it chooses a partner of another race, religion, sex or gender?
Telling your parents. If you’re a teen or young woman, talking to your parents may be difficult. List your reasons for telling/not telling, even if you think you may disappoint them. If the hardest part is getting the words out, consider writing your parents a letter and then read it to them. Talking with them may make you feel safer, more confident and supported, and they may have helpful insight and advice. If you fear that a parent may become violent, or physically or emotionally abusive, consider speaking to someone you trust first to help you decide. You can always contact a Summit counselor if you need assistance with telling a parent, or talking about options.
Again, at Summit Centers, we welcome you to take advantage of our counseling services free of charge. Contact your local facility today to make an appointment, or just walk-in.
You may find this online Pregnancy Options Workbook helpful in sorting out feelings about your pregnancy: http://www.pregnancyoptions.info/pregnant.htm
If you’ve decided to have an abortion but are unsure as to which method to choose, visit this for additional help: http://www.pregnancyoptions.info/whichmethod.htm
Lastly, if you’ve had an abortion and are looking for guidance with emotional/spiritual healing, visit: http://www.pregnancyoptions.info/emotional&spiritual.htm